Day 17: Â What knowledge are you grateful for?
Honestly, I am enjoying these gratitude questions as I find them to be thought-provoking. I mean when was the last time you considered being grateful for knowledge let alone a specific knowledge? 😛 As a person who hungers for knowledge as a way of coping with the craziness of this world, it is difficult to pinpoint a particular knowledge. However, what comes to mind in my current state of frenzy is that I am grateful to have learned and come to understand the role of mindfulness and meditation. I cannot claim to have full knowledge of this yet as I am not sure that anyone present on this earth has it; however, I am grateful that knowing about it came to my awareness as it has honestly saved me this past month. It is frightening to think where I would be right now if I did not know how to go into a mindful meditative state to calm me or give me perspective on my current situation. So, yes, indeed I am grateful for this knowledge.
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I must admit that my head is swimming lately and I have to remind myself to focus on one task or thought frequently. I used to pride myself in being able to sit still for hours on end and lose myself in a thought or activity. With so much unsettledness at the moment, I am struggling to keep myself centered and grounded on activities that I know will help me to induce a quasi-sense of norm into my life.
One topic I wanted to touch upon is a sense of spiritual connectedness returning to me. In my 20s and early 30s, I spent a lot of time at churches or reading the Bible and seeking a relationship with God as encouraged by Christian beliefs. When I divorced, I spent probably an equal amount of time avoiding these kinds of activities as a sense of rebellion, revenge and cutting of a spiritual connection with my ex.
Then, I began to do yoga and coaching. A new awareness of a spirit within came and I embraced it as a semi-new-age way of incorporating the concept of God into me without embracing a specific religion. No formal religion has ever appealed to me or convinced me enough to identify with it completely. Now, the more I work through the philosophy of yoga and meditation, I am drawn to the teachings that we have the spiritual greatness within us that connects us to the Universe. It is the Universal Spirit that guides us.
As I start to make sense of what this might really mean, I am finding that I am returning to some of the Christian beliefs. The Lord has now become the Lord Universe to me – a larger presence greater than man who guides us through our inner spirits. The Holy Spirit may be its Christian name, but I prefer to combine these concepts because I do not believe we need to divide into religious dogmas – rather we can rejoice in a common understanding that we have power within us to behave according to a Universal desire for union, love, compassion and greatness for ourselves and for others.
This ‘awakening’ and re-realization has helped me immensely through a time of testing my patience, my trust, my sanity, etc. With it also comes some clarity and focus. 😀
~T 😀
