Creative Meanderings

My fascination with religions stems back to my foster family days – the one just before I was adopted by my family now. Although later I would learn that they were Seventh Day Adventist, at the time I just knew that I went to church and started out in the church school. 

Some time later I recalled the stories from Bible school and found a book that I had probably been given about man’s exile from the Garden of Eden. 

Throughout my youth, I had a back and forth relationship with various Christian churches, but my skeptical attitude toward blind faith always kept me from a full acceptance to and in the church. 

When I got married I went regularly to church with my ex and got heavily involved in the church. Until they chose to judge me for the circumstances of the dissolution of my marriage, I thought perhaps I had been wrong about organized religions. I questioned my atittude toward choosing colleges that were not heavily affiliated with religions. However, the reaction of those in the church I had put a lot of myself into and the friends that I thought I had invested in turned me away from ever going back to such a way of life.

Still, I am a lover of philosophy and a believer in knowledge. 

A few of my college friends are Mormon and so I became interested in why and how they believed what they did. I got my hands on literature to understand, but instead just came up with more questions. 

With the same curiosity, I have always been fascinated by the Church of Scientology. Aside from the fact that big celebrities like John Travolta and Tom Cruise are heavily entrenched in the faith, I just find it interesting. The idea of cults and religions is a curious thing as the human mind and spirit is so fragile that people want to be led to believe they are important no matter the sacrifice. 

Upon conversation with some friends this week, I decided to watch a documentary on the CofS. Having done so, I am glad I did. It was really interesting. Although my suspicions about some of the beliefs based on rumors that were circulated in the media have been confirmed, I still find it so amazing at the ability of one man to convince a large population to accept what he believes as the truth. 

I am more and more convinced that my skepticism towards any belief system is the right way to go. If I am considered stubborn or cynical, I am okay with that! 😛

~T 😀

Nobody makes money blogging. Writers never earn enough to survive on. Just do what you need to and get by. You can dream, but also be realistic.

Sound familiar?

I had earlier determined that I need to probably really take some steps toward finding a regularly paying job. This may mean that I need to give up my efforts to build a business or focus more on my writing. Initially, I thought I would look for work that I could do online, but as I began to sift through the options posted on the freelancing sites, I found that it is a great deal of effort to find the jobs that are going to either be accepted by the employer based on my simple proposals or will be acceptable to me for the rate they are offering. The truth is that I am not used to working a lot for little.

Then, I thought if I were to make a list of the type of jobs I am looking for, then at least I would know how to start with keyword searches and the like. As I began, the list was two in when I wrote simply – a job that pays me to write; a writing job that pays me to write what I want to write for a reasonable and regular pay. That was as far as I got. In the end, this is what I want.

While the yoga and tutoring are good side jobs that help to pay bills, what I would love to do is to write all day long, know that money will be coming in that will be a real living and return to enjoying life again. Is it too much to ask? 

Now, I know things like this do not happen overnight. I know that I have kept this blog rather secure and somewhat hidden from mainstream, but I do have other blogs that can be adapted and refreshed to perhaps generate some income. Maybe I won’t make a fortune, but I can make something!

So, as I work to turn The Universal Asian into a creative writing center, I will also work to making the blog portion of The OSH Network as a lifestyle center. Even though I am using it to promote wellness and health, it does not mean that it cannot also be a place where I share lifestyle aspects about food, nutrition, health, etc. RIGHT?!

Maybe the above statements were true when my dreams of becoming a writer were first sprouting, but the truth is that if a dream stays alive inside, then it is really up to me and only me to make it a reality.

~T 😀

Sometimes I sit down to write my posts knowing that I have thought of a number of different topics to discuss – always thinking I should start a post draft when the idea comes to me, but wave it off saying I’ll remember it – and then I sit to start writing see nothing but the white text box in front of me.

The vastness of the empty space filters into my mind removing all other thoughts and ideas. Therefore, whatever I thought I was going to write about is gone.

It is strange how this happens as there are times when I sit to meditate and really want my mind to empty out and yet it keeps getting filled with thought after thought. Yet, when I want to write the attachment to various things seems to disappear into wisps of grey matter.

This behavior – if we can call it that – reminds me of an etch-a-sketch. Remember those things? We would work hard to turn the dials to create an image and then in two or three shakes of the box, the entire image was either blurred or completely wiped away as if nothing was ever there in the first place.

So, today, I awoke with many thoughts to post, but by the time I have sat down to write, everything is gone and I feel the need for an afternoon nap…. 😛

~T 😀