Mar 232020
 

Unless you’ve been under a rock or blissfully enjoying a Luddite world, in which case you wouldn’t be reading this, you will be aware of the global crisis known as COVID-19 or the Coronavirus.

Now, I’m not a prepper, panicker, conformist, or doomsday believer. In fact, in a state of emergency I have always said that I will be found as far away from the masses as possible because it’s people we have to worry about.

This is no different and, in fact, requires isolation and distance from others.

In many ways, this pandemic has numerous positives.

First, an introverts dream is to be considered ‘normal’ for hiding away from others. For most of the world, this is being required! I mean, “OH, I can’t go out and I can’t attend any social functions? Gee, that’s a real shame!” NOT! πŸ˜‚- more like HAPPY DANCE! 🍾🀣

Second, if we have a massive population decrease, the Earth will surely be able to deeply sigh in relief from the burden of overpopulation. Sure, the loss of loved ones old, young, ill, healthy, etc. is sad and all that, but c’mon, can we really begrudge nature’s attempt to balance out the scales? I surely do not. πŸ’ͺ🏽

Also, for the first time in ages, people are actually spending time with their children away from the TV and devices. More parents are talking about playing with their kids and families seem to be interacting with each other. OMG, what is that?! 😝

It’s also a great time to start any online businesses or promote technology in a positive way – i.e. online learning, remote working, etc. Stay tuned for my own activity in this area. πŸ˜‰

There are obviously a number of downsides for those who are in serious ‘lockdown’. Being confined and forced to limit any usual activity is no picnic. Imprisonment is used as a form of punishment for a reason, after all.

Without focusing on the negatives too much or celebrating the joys of self-isolation and social distancing, I am interested in the panic mechanism.

Now, I get ALL of my news from limited sources: in person from people around me, Facebook, The Daily podcast (NY Times), and once in the morning from Google’s morning information as I get ready. On rare occasions, I might open a news app or watch the news. Usually, this happens passively – I see it on someone else’s device, on the train, etc. Therefore, if I actually self-isolated, I would be forced to get my news from mass media.

It’s no wonder then that people panic. In Japan, almost everyone has Japanese TV on when at home. People read newspapers and stay well connected to mass media via Line (like WhatsApp) or to some extent Facebook. Therefore, if there are reports that toilet paper 🧻 supply might run out, everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) sprints out to grab as much toilet paper as they can. The “Great TP Scare of 2020” will go down in history and Japanese people will have the cleanest bums for years to come!

However, looking at images from around the world, we see that this panic has spread – irrationally! It’s not just that countries are unprepared to cope with a health crisis, it’s also that people are unprepared to cope with any crisis.

My father is a prepper and always has been. I never thought it odd to have a freezer full of meat until people began to tease me about it. I never thought it odd to make enough food in a meal for days of leftovers until I met others who somehow just made enough food for one meal. How is that a thing?! So, my cupboards are always full. Even if I have limited space, I will make room for cans of beans or rice or whatever can be used over a long period of time. It never occurred to me that it was a prepping behavior. πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈ

As things seem to worsen around the world, the opposite seems to be happening in Japan. It never really shutdown when things got ‘serious’ in February. Schools were let out early as it was the end of the academic year anyway, and there was an increase in encouraging remote work for many companies. However, overall, it’s a little as if we are in a bubble of either denial or amazing immunity.

In any case, my theory is that there is no need to panic. I am not sure if Japan has it right or not, but staying away from Western news helps. My question for those who are panicking is: Do you actually know anyone who has the virus? If so, how ill are they and have they died? If not… chill the F*&k out, then!!! πŸ˜‰

Anyway, stay healthy out there and if you don’t like people anyway – like me – then enjoy this crazy time to the fullest!!! πŸ’πŸ½β€β™€οΈπŸ’ƒπŸ½πŸ˜‡πŸ˜

~T πŸ˜€

Mar 042020
 

Where does the time go? There I was thinking that I was on regular schedule for posting, but then three weeks just flew by! Now, I am back in March and hoping to not jinx my flow.

I guess I have still been a bit busy with work and trying to find the ever elusive balance to life. Whenever I think that I’ve done it, like a see-saw, the balance is quickly lost the moment a bit more on one side or the other appears. So, for now, I’m going to ride the tip toward writing here again.

One thing I have been pondering lately is the temporariness of everything. I recently had a scare that I could lose someone dear to me. While I know that this is an inevitable reality of life – everyone dies eventually – , I was not prepared to consider it for that person.

Often, when I watch shows where someone has died (this is a lot thanks to my addiction to true crime stories), the survivors always say the person who passed was wonderful, amazing, loving, so kind, full of life, etc. I keep wanting someone to say “She was a royal biotch!” or “He was an absolute dick.” It’s like saying that would mean that s/he deserved to die, which is not at all how I think. I just wish that we were honest about how people were/are in life. It’s nice to look fondly on people, and it sells better than if the person were not a good one, but life is temporary and why recall it differently than it is/was?

Since I was very young I have let go of my attachment to life. This does not mean that I haven’t and don’t live my life to the fullest. In fact, because I have let go of my attachment, I feel free to live it up. While I would definitely be pissed off if I was somehow incapable of living life as I know it, I would not look back with regret for the life I have lived.

However, this lack of attachment has also allowed me to live life for myself. I don’t have to worry about leaving kids behind. I don’t have a passionate cause to live and fight for. I don’t have strings attached to the world. Yet, related to re-finding purpose, it also has a downside in that the temporariness of this life leaves me floating a bit too aimlessly.

When I thought that I could lose my loved one, I wondered what life would be like without that person in my life. In turn, I wondered what life would be like without me in it. Right now, I think that it wouldn’t matter much except to those near and dear. Yet, I feel somewhat unsatisfied by that. So, now, I am thinking about what I can do to give back and leave a little something behind.

Thus, I am embracing the temporariness of life and looking forward to narrowing down what I will leave behind.

~T πŸ˜€

Mar 022020
 

Call it midlife crisis or call it whatever you like, but I have been trying to find purpose (again) these days.

When one chooses not to have children, it becomes more difficult at a certain age to define what life is all about. As someone who has spent most of her life trying to be comfortable in her own skin and only recently feeling that is completed, I am now wondering what do I do with this newfound comfort.

This year I decided to make it a goal to work from home more, if not full-time. This is more complicated than just finding online work as I also have to have a visa to continue living in Japan. My three-year visa runs out in October of this year, so it is important that I keep my current full-time position until I renew my visa. Therefore, this gives me a bit of time to at least put some ideas into motion.

While I was struggling with what to do with my life, so to speak, I went into a bit of a fog. It wasn’t a complete depressive state, but it was enough for me to feel a bit lost. Having lost interest and ambition in the world of academia, which is what I have known my entire adult life, I didn’t know where to turn.

Throughout my life, I have not had time or energy to find a passion or cause to champion. I was busy trying to survive life and understand how to navigate through what was given to me. It also takes a level of confidence and certainty about one’s existence to then feel that promoting a cause of some kind is meaningful out of the self – at least that’s how I think about it.

As I mentioned before, having kids sort of gives people a cause by default – whether or not the kids want it πŸ˜› . Without kids, one must come up with something on their own. Oftentimes, one’s partner might become the cause – live for them or help them to change. Neither of those are my cup of tea either.

Still, many studies suggest that giving back to a community or society in some way provides great contentment and satisfaction in life. It’s just that finding the way to give back so that I feel inspired has been evading me.

Finally, though, I think I have found something that is meaningful and could be inspirational. I’m still in the brainstorming phase with a need to do some research on how to build it up and possibly monetize it. However, this feels like something that will stick. I also have some other money making ideas that I need to focus on as well, but at last the brain is starting to move with a forward motion rather than a circular one.

Stay tuned for updates! Fingers-crossed I don’t get lost in it!

~T πŸ˜€

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