Yikes, the time has flown by and April is already almost over. I hardly know how the time has passed, but life is good.
I am always in a state of trying to balance all the things I want to do (which is a lot) with what I have to do (which isn’t that much). Then, it’s also about not stressing about not getting that much done in the end. Sometimes, I think the luxury of having my own time without structure is not always good for me. Then, I recall what it used to be like with a full-time job and a life on demand….
The other day, I had a call with a mentor for the Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program (MMTCP) that I am in for the next two years. In our conversation, I laughed at my lack of interest in group activities unless they are on my terms. Some might say I am a control freak, but I consider it a strength of knowing who I am and what works for me. It is not that I am inflexible, but rather that most people are inconsistent and untrustworthy in their promises/commitments that it is not worth it to me to let them lead the way.
Someone else said to me that sometimes people just want to be led.
In my experience, I feel this is more often the case for the majority. It works OK for me, because by leading I can do things “my way”. On the other hand, I also appreciate it when others step up to lead.
So, ultimately, I am content with doing my own thing. I have twice said this week that I am very independent. It’s a quality, I value. Freedom and independence are high requirements for my life. Both I have the privilege of claiming these days.
Therefore, with that in mind, April has passed quickly. May is already full of activities and such, but the weather is turning and more outside time is ahead. Soaking up the Vitamin D always makes me happy, even if not always the most productive!
Well, back to it for now!
~T 
