Tara

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Making Ourselves at Home

Aug 042016

We are now five days in to our new home and I am personally completely in love with the place. They say money cannot buy happiness, but money can buy rent for a lovely place that results in happiness! 😛

So far, we have not been too hot without AC as long as we cool off the apartment as much as we can when we are home by leaving the front door open for the lobby air to waft in. In truth, I’ll probably do this even when we have working AC as it will keep costs down for us – as long as the fur balls don’t cause trouble for our neighbors by exploring the lobby area…. 😐

After my second day with a cold shower, I decided that it was time to explore the health club downstairs. So, yesterday I went down for a steam sauna and then had a warm shower, which made me extremely happy. Again, I’ll likely just keep doing this as it will keep water costs down. 😉

Almost all of the rooms are organized now. Today was the third room, but I did not manage to finish it as the dust was getting to me and I wanted to have time to do my own thing this afternoon as I did not have time to post here yesterday. It is important to keep having a balance as there will always be distractions to keep me from writing or staying on a routine. Besides, I had some errands to run as well. 🙂

Slowly, everything is coming together. Another few hours of organizing should just about settle things for this Phase II work. Of course, when M’s stuff arrives out of storage, it will be another session of ‘nesting’, but then we can take stock of our combined items and also see what we need to add to our home to have everything settled. It is actually kind of exciting! 😛

On Saturday we will be collecting the kitties, which will be nice to have them back. I will have to be sure to hide everything breakable or of value to us after two months of not having to worry about such things, but it will be nice to have the pudi-tats back! All is well!

~T 😀

_One Hundred Years of Solitude_ by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Literary Escapes No Responses »

Aug 022016

_One Hundred Years of Solitude_ by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

This was a beautiful story of three generations of the Buendia family in their hometown. While the town changes, the family’s complex relationship, characters and connection do not. The story has everything from war, love, drama, death and mystery. Using Latin American culture and mysticism beliefs, Marquez creates such a lovely story.

Like his other stories, I thoroughly enjoyed this read. I wish I could read his works in Spanish to fully appreciate the language as I imagine it is beautiful. Still, I enjoyed the English version fully.

Not much more to say about this. 😀

~T 😀

Phase IIA: Glamping

Going Mental No Responses »

Aug 012016

When Phase I of our big move and change was completed, I was hopeful and excited about our new adventure and home. When our one month wait got delayed another month, I went through a number of different emotions. Through it all, I have learned patience and the role of controlling the thoughts I have as I become aware of whether or not they are serving me or hindering me/us.

So, although Phase II is not complete, we are finally in Phase II!

Yesterday, our stuff (rather mostly MY stuff) arrived to our new apartment. Despite the hours ahead needed to reorganize and put away things as I like, it feels amazing to be in our own space again. 😀 Unpacking is definitely much harder than packing, especially with the moving company. The movers just decided to put stuff away in random places, I will take pictures of the kitchen cabinets before I try to put some sense of order to it. 😛

In any case, I am taking one room a day to make sure it is organized and put together. Some rooms may take a couple of days, but last night I made sure the bathroom was in order and our bed made. This morning, I completed the master bedroom closets and arranging the room a bit, so now our room is just about good to go.

As for why Phase II is not complete, well, there are two more parts: 1)electricity and Internet; 2)M’s stuff in storage. Part one means, no lights, no hot water, no Internet/TV and no AC.

Fortunately, the apartment keeps itself from being boiling due to the centralized AC system in the building. When we are in the apartment, we can leave the front door open (there are only two apartments on the floor) and let in the cool air from the elevator lobby without much disturbance to or from anyone else. Therefore, this is not really a problem. Besides, there are plenty of places for us to go in the complex to get AC if we need to cool down.

As for lights, there is plenty of daylight shining through during the day. Thankfully, we were able to use the poles from the other apartment to hang up curtains in the bedroom to limit the afternoon sun that heats up the room. However, generally speaking there is plenty of light until the sun goes down. At night, we are doing a form of ‘glamping’ with candles to light our way. It’s romantic, isn’t it?

Our main struggle is charging our electronic devices and lack of Internet. Although we do not really watch normal TV much, we do use the Internet to stream and so that will be a bit of a challenge for us in the evenings. We can go to The Lounge downstairs to charge up and use WiFi for the most part, but it will require some thought to ensure we are charged up through the night. They also have large screen TVs, but we will be limited to whatever they have showing – or we can stream on our iPads with some background noise. First-world troubles, really. 😉 Luckily for us we both go to bed quite early so it is not like there are many hours of dark to get through. 😛

This morning’s cold shower was a bit of a shocker, but when it is so warm outside, it is okay. Also, we can always use the health club showers if the cold ones at home become too much. Thus, overall, I cannot complain. In fact, I am so happy to be in our new home together at last. There is still some limbo, but at least this feels like a step forward rather than treading water. 🙂

And, the best part is, that after a long day with the move-in, we got to go to the jacuzzi and soak my tired feet. Not too shabby, eh? 😉

~T 😀

Zenning My Sh*t

Going Mental No Responses »

Jul 302016

“Worrying just attracts the things you don’t want” is a quote I saw either on FB or in one of my readings this summer.

When I took up meditation and mindfulness last year M and I would joke that I was learning to “zen my sh*t”. While I still struggle with this and have off days I can definitely say that my mind has started to make a significant shift from stressing and worrying.

A number of years ago I read _The Secret_ , which I had been skeptical about given its rather “airy fairy” hippy spiritual following. However, I discovered that the law of attraction is no joke. We can attribute it to God the father, or Allah or whom/whatever we feel most comfortable with in our spiritual world, but the concept of attracting what we spend time focusing upon cannot be denied as truth.

This summer I have spent quite a bit of time considering the subconscious mind and testing the strategies of positive affirmations. I can honestly say that without this I would be writing suicidal thoughts, woe-is-me themed posts and pondering the stupidity of my actions. However, I am not doing this (am I?) and feel more optimistic than I have in a long time that M and I are on the road to wealth, success, health and prosperity. These are the words and thoughts that I try to focus on.

When worry starts to enter my thoughts I ask myself the following:

Can I do anything about it?
If I can, what is my action to remedy the situation?
If I cannot, what is the use in worrying and possibly attracting more crap my way?

A bit of time focusing on breath, offering compassion to the world and trusting in what I do not know nor have control over helps me to find peace and calm.

The result is that I have not had a massive breakdown recently when I really should have; I am comforting my husband when he is stressed rather than adding to it; I am smiling as we prepare for the movers to deliver the first half of our things to our new apartment.

Therefore, I believe I can confidently say that I am zenning my sh*t quite well! 😛

~T 😀

_Outlander_ by Diana Gabaldon

Literary Escapes No Responses »

Jul 292016

_Outlander_ by Diana Gabaldon

For the past week or so I have been consumed by this 850-page novel. I came across it on the bookshelf where residents at PR leave unwanted books for others to take freely. Although I already have a long list of books I want to read, including ones I am still reading, I took a few more from the shelf.

Most of the summer I have been needing a piece of work that would take me to another world and engage me fully. It helps release some stress temporarily and also gives me writing examples. While I have read almost a dozen books already since the end of May, I was still searching for a story to suck me in.

Since my eldest step-daughter had been reading this last summer and the tv series has been popular, I thought I would move it up on my reading list. After all, there was obviously some reason I found it on the free bookshelf, right? 😛

Well from the first page to the last I was absolutely engrossed. Even when I started to doubt the main character a bit, my doubts were quickly resolved a few pages later. While I still have questions about some parts, these do not affect the story or, in fact, enhances it because I am still thinking about it!

When I did a search for how many others there are in the series I was quite surprised to find there are quite a few. Given the length of this one I am impressed that the series goes beyond a trilogy. 😉

In any case, I will definitely put the tv series on the top of my “next watch” list and after I finish up some of my other already-started books, I just might not let too much time pass before delving into the next one.

~T 😀

_David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants_ by Malcolm Gladwell

Literary Escapes No Responses »

Jul 282016

_David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants_ by Malcolm Gladwell

Over three years ago, I posted upon hearing about this new title by Gladwell. No doubt, he already has another one out, but I do not yet know about it. 😉 I have really enjoyed just about everything he has written and this one did not disappoint.

Gladwell takes this well-known Biblical story and challenges us to reconsider just why David beat Goliath. Although we enjoy the story of the ‘underdog’ winning over all odds against him, Gladwell retells the story in a way that makes us rethink that perhaps it was not such an amazing feat that David accomplished. Using related stories from history and making social commentary, the writer takes us on a journey to learn how to give credit to circumstances for the winning of what seems impossible.

If nothing else, we can discover that no matter how impossible things may look, it is just a matter of perception and understanding of the situation. If we shift perspective, then even the biggest challenge can be made small.

Even though I read this quite some time ago and am just now getting to writing about it, I find that the message of the book is even more appropriate now than it was before. So, it is timely to finally get to writing about this Gladwell book now. 😛

~T 😀

FLOTUS into Politics

Going Mental No Responses »

Jul 272016

For most of my adult life I have steered clear of politics. I have brief moments in and out where I try to care, but for the most part I find that I get frustrated or depressed from the state of the world and generally am cynical about politicians and the world of politics.

Furthermore, I struggle to find anyone in politics to be someone worth respecting or admiring for their presence, words, behavior or general existence. In fact, I just ignore them altogether.

However, in the past year or so I have kept one eye and ear on Michelle Obama. Although I am sure she has been “public” and mainstream for the past seven years, I did not notice with my head in the sand and all. 😛 My head has come out briefly given the potential calamity of the US presidential elections. So, I must say that I am impressed and awed by this woman.

It is a shame that now, at the end of her husband’s presidency, she is shining; but I really hope this is only the beginning for Michelle Obama. She holds poise, grace, intellect, passion and beauty throughout this speech at the Democratic National Convention:

Meanwhile, she also shows her ‘let loose’ side with Carpool Karaoke.

The more that I see, the more I want to follow her next steps. While my cynical side that watches far too many TV shows of “Scandal”, “West Wing” or “House of Cards” might say this is a short-lived glimpse of someone we are dying to have faith in, my optimistic side says she might be the real deal. So, only time will tell, but I am willing to keep my head up for a while and see where this FLOTUS takes us before the changing of the guards. 😀

~T 😀

On Cruise Control…

Going Mental No Responses »

Jul 262016

My car has cruise control and I use it a lot to avoid getting speeding tickets in the city or on the long endless road from Abu Dhabi to Dubai. Even though I use the cruise control, I still try to stay alert to the cars around me as well as where the cameras are or where the speed limit changes. Therefore, despite having the amazing mechanism of ensuring I stay under the limit, I try to never fully turn off my awareness.

My husband’s car does not have a working cruise control system. Not only that, but he tends not to pay attention to where the cameras are nor where speed limits change. He is by no means a bad driver, but he has been known to rack up a hefty speeding ticket amount. If he drives my car, he does a bit better, but without the awareness it does not necessarily help much.

This has made me start to think about parallels in life where we are easily on cruise control, but may not be aware or active enough so that when changes happen we are caught off guard and given a wake up call.

For example, how often do marriages start to fall apart because we each do our part in the marriage: the husband goes off to work to earn a living to support the family; the wife takes care of the house and kids and/or also goes off to work to help support the family; they come home maybe have dinner together, maybe have a brief conversation together and maybe rarely share a kiss, or an “I love you” because they are both tired from cruising through their daily routine. Then, one day one of them wakes up a little, realizing that he or she wants something more but does not know how to approach it. Maybe he or she sees their partner seemingly happy on cruise control, so they have an affair or start to act up or pick fights or whatever it is in order to give some sort of signal that he or she wants to ‘brake out’ of their cruise control routine. Unfortunately, because people rarely talk openly and honestly with one another there is confusion, resentment and most of all fear in the idea of change – even the smallest amount. Then, life begins to fall apart. Looking back, people always wonder when they should have known that life was not going alright for them, but since they were in the false sense of security of cruise control, they generally cannot pinpoint the when.

These past two months have taught me many lessons and no doubt a lot more to come. However, one of the best lessons I have learned so far is the need for open and honest communication with my husband. Sometimes we think we are protecting the other person by not sharing our worries or stresses, but really we are lying to them when we pretend to take care of things ourselves or act as if we are okay with everything. We went through a period of almost daily yelling at each other for one thing or another. The fact was that it was because usually one of us felt too much pressure or alone in our situation. The key is that it is OUR situation – not just his or just mine. There may be some fear that the partner might get upset over what needs to be shared, but through the sharing there is a building of trust and respect that works through the moments of being upset. On the other side is a better understanding, a sense of companionship and a stronger team to get through it all.

So, while we might miss our time on cruise control, it has also been good to drive without it retraining ourselves to be aware of one another and to learn how to prepare for changes that will inevitably happen so that they are mere speed bumps rather than high-priced tickets. 😛

~T 😀

30 Days of Gratitude

Going Mental No Responses »

Jul 252016

Day 30: What talent or skill do you have that you are grateful for?

When I first thought about the answer to this question, my mind came up with my ability to problem solve. Generally, I am the one who brainstorms ways to get out of a pickle and then takes action to make it happen once deemed the best choice in the moment. This is indeed a great skill to have especially during the past couple of months. However, when I consider the very moment what I am actually grateful for in my skills is that I can speak, read and write (sometimes) in Japanese. Why? Well, for some reason that I shall not question nor complain at all about, I have found tutoring opportunities in Japanese. That’s right, not English, but my second (err third?) language. It will be fairly lucrative if the lessons hold and the fact that I have experience learning the language, speak English well and can teach are highly in my favor to maintain these chances. So, while with all tutoring, nothing is ever for sure nor consistent, I can still say that I am grateful that I have this skill to give us a chance to make a few extra dirhams in our time of ‘need’. 😛

——

Well, today is the last day of the 30-day Gratitude challenge and I must say that the days went quickly. It was excellent for me to focus a bit each day on finding something to be thankful for as there were/are some days when I can easily choose to go the other way in my thinking.

However, the light is drawing closer at the end of our tunnel. We are starting to really see and feel hope for our lives to return to a sense of normal. It has not quite been the summer that we had planned on, but the truth is that if we needed to go through this period of our lives and marriage, now is definitely the time to have done it. There is much to be grateful for each and every day. The more that we focus on these positives the more it comes our way – it seems.

I have realized the importance of the words, tone and attitude I use as well. While I may say something positive, if my tone and attitude are a bit cynical or even a little sarcastic, then it diminishes the uplifting value of the good that is happening. Instead, I want to grow into the ideally graceful, generous and inspirational woman who emits love, compassion and happiness to those around me.

While I, like everyone, have many talents and skills to offer the world, what I truly desire is to offer an example of what it means to live life full of joy, love and contentment with the world doing my part to making it and others better. It may have taken me a while to get to this point of my life, I am here now. My new aspirations in life are to really live fully with these elements emanating from me wherever I go and with whomever I meet. 😀

~T 😀

Open Home and Hearts

Going Mental No Responses »

Jul 242016

Day 29: What friend/family member are you grateful for today?

This is hardly a fair question as someone is bound to be offended if I do not say I am grateful for them. It would be an easy cop out to say ALL of my family and friends, which would be true. However, I am going to risk the offense and focus on the TODAY part of the question.

Today and for the last two months I have been beyond thankful for our friends D&E. If it were not for them we would be either homeless or sharing a space with others or paying out of our arses in hotel fees.

Thankfully, because of summer holidays and the generosity of these two (and L, of course), we have had a place to stay as comfortably as could be possible in a space that is not ours during our transition period. Of course, we have good friends all around who would open their homes to us, but it has been very fortuitous that it has worked out for us this way.

Hopefully, we will be moving into our new space soon (sans electricity – another story for another post) and able to focus on repaying our friends for their open home and hearts. 🙂

~T 😀

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