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Rugby World Cup 2023

Sep 192023

I don’t know when I became a rugby fan. Perhaps, it was when most of my friends were from Australia and New Zealand. Perhaps, it was the first time I saw the haka performed. Perhaps, it was just a natural progression from growing up with sports on TV quite a lot to enjoying internationally celebrated ones once outside of the U.S.

In any case, I’m now a major rugby fan! 🏉

The last world cup was held in Japan in 2019 while we were there. They managed to get it in before the pandemic shut things down. We were there to enjoy; and the bonus for M was seeing England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 reach the finals (they sadly lost that one).

So, it was with some excitement when we realized that we would be in (or near) France when the 2023 Rugby World Cup came around.

As with most things these days in trying to get tickets, we attempted and passed on high-priced tickets. But, eventually, we were able to find some reasonably priced ones and in a location 🏟️ that was easy enough for us to get to. On top of that, it was to be a fun match between England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 and Japan 🇯🇵.

The day came this past weekend in Nice. We took the chance to go a few days early to see some friends, get some things we had left from the summer, and then have a night in Nice before driving home the next day.

It was a blast and the experience was well worth everything! Plus, it helped that England won! 😀

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Struggling with the Italian Way…

Going Mental No Responses »

Sep 112023

The thing about being an expat is that there are cycles of culture shock that are forgotten about when living abroad for so long. We start to take think that just because we are experienced at the way of life we are exempt from the ups and downs of culture shock. Well, a rude awakening has come with a rather unexpected dip lately.

Not having a grasp of the language, and therefore, the culture, makes it hard to reconcile the frustrations felt around time, commitments, and expectations. Recently, this has become more an “issue” than before, though I know it is not that anything in our surroundings that have changed – it really us not them. 🤪

M is especially struggling as he lacks patience in many ways with many things. Sometimes he can be very very patient, but not when it comes to agreements that involve business or monetary transactions. 😬

So, it seems the Italian way is to charm you into agreeing to do a deal with them whether it is renovations for a kitchen, work on a car, or get permissions for structural changes on your property. The initial steps are very active so that one gets lulled into thinking action will be swift.

Then, happily everyone agrees with a statement, naively taken as a promise, of timeframes and what to expect. Hands are shaken. Smiles are shown. Friendly exchange considered to be a sign of satisfaction.

Yet… the time comes and goes… reality sinks in. The phrase “It’s Italy” with a 🤷🏽‍♀️ shrug of the shoulders is expressed as a way to soften the blow – it’s gonna require patience and more time than said out loud. 🤦🏽‍♀️

The cycle repeats itself with EVERY. SINGLE. THING.

We booked our kitchen to be installed this month back in April or May. We have yet to hear anything. Even our so-called friendly lawyer who introduced us to a new company has yet to follow through. We spend some days waiting around for an answer or update to no avail. Our cars have been in and out of the mechanics for a week or three weeks when it is a day-job at most.

It’s true, some of these things we could do ourselves, but we choose not to. Most we cannot. It’s also true that we accept and acknowledge that there is a “foreigner tax” on prices and even dealings/negotiations that require patience in the learning curve. However, the main fact is that Italians just work when it is convenient for them to do so regardless of who the client might be. The plus is that we realize we should not take it personally, but that doesn’t make it better time-wise when we want to get things done.

So, we wait. M makes calls, leaves messages, threatens to take business elsewhere and repeats his own cycle of frustration and angst. I wait. I ask unhelpful questions 😜 and nag because I can.

Probably, all of it will get done in time – just on Italian time. 🙄😅

~T 🔥🐉♋️

On the Tara-Train Track: WootWoot!

Going Mental No Responses »

Sep 082023

Well, I promised an update from earlier in the week and so here it is. 😁

The time both flew by and also felt just right in providing me the space/break needed to get myself resettled into a routine/rhythm. As I had hoped, I got ahead of schedule on things and two of three manuscripts are now out of my hands for the time-being. One more to go before the next wave begins. 😅

I’ve got ten days left before the online yoga course starts, but I’m feeling mostly prepped for it to start and ahead in my mental planning, so that is really all that matters.

M is back as well, so that actually has given me a bit of relief from the pressures of caring for the animals as well. 😬

The other night, one or both of the pups decided to demolish a tube/container of ant powder. The bits of it were scattered across the lawn and I have no idea how much they/she might have consumed. However, in the evening a little before bedtime, one of them (you can guess which one) decided to leave vomit all around the house. This obviously caused me concern, frantically searching on Google what to do, and worry setting in. Most information online said it should be fine, but still…. It was in the restless wee hours of the morning as I wondered if I was going to have to go to the vet again, that I realized: I am NOT cut out to care for other living creatures. I thought I didn’t have children because I didn’t want to pass on my sh*t to them psychologically, but also I didn’t have children because it is so freaking stressful to be responsible for another life!!!!! 😩

In the end, the dogs were fine. By morning, there was no sign of distress and no middle of the night accidents occurred, so there was nothing to worry about – I’m sure.

However, I am in awe of parents and single-parents once again. 🤯 I mean, I was just caring for dogs, which are like toddlers for a looooooong time, but whew! 🤣

Anyway, it definitely made me appreciate having a partner and that he is now back to take care of the stressful aspects. He’s had kids, so he’s already trained to manage these things! 😇

It’s Friday and I’m glad the week is over. It’s nice to have the man back, though it was also lovely to have the time to just get myself resorted. Lots of thoughts and other things have come up over the week, but will save that for another post.

Have a lovely weekend!!

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Game of Catching-Up

Going Mental No Responses »

Sep 042023

It’s an interesting phenomenon that one inflicts a sense of urgency and demand on oneself even when not in an office environment or surroundings where it is easy to pinpoint the source.

While my work from home fluctuates from trickles to tidal waves, I do not have what one would call “stressful” jobs as a freelance contract worker. On top of that, I have a very cushy home and personal life as there are no kids or relatives to raise my stress levels, even if I do have a tendency to complain about the man now and then.😝 Yet, for the last week or so I have felt stressed!

I mean, sure, needing to complete edits on two full manuscripts ASAP, prep for an online yoga course, correct online assignments regularly, and try to write my own stuff while attempting to be social with staying guests–all while also maintaining the EPA duties that most wives carry out for their partners, could be deemed reasonable sources of stress. 😅

Still, I somehow feel weak for it.

Luckily, I believe the Universe heard me and saw me falling onto the path toward hysteria and meltdown, so I have been blessed with five glorious days of freedom from everything except what I want to do!

This means, I have spent most of the last 36 hours or so playing catch-up and working to get ahead of the game. My task list is looking more manageable and I would say that even my writing this the night before I am to publish it is a sign that I’m back on the “Tara-train track”. 😬 Although there is still a lot to get done, I think from tomorrow most things will be for future deadlines rather than ones past or ones looming. I do not like to work with pressure–never have and don’t intend to start now! 😁

So, with that, it’s about time for me to hit the hay to ensure I get my rest to be at my best productivity this week. I’ve got a mix of plans to see some friends and also enjoy some “me-time” activities. All that, plus work, so a girl needs her rest! 💜

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Autumnal Shifts

Going Mental No Responses »

Sep 012023

Summer used to be my favorite season. That was until anything hotter than about 85F turned me into a fiery devil! 👿 Last summer, we had determined that we didn’t want to be in Italy for the August hell 🥵 temperatures since we spent about two weeks living in one room of the house during the day as we couldn’t justify having the A/C on all day.

This summer, we had planned to be away in France where it is closer to the Mediterranean Sea and our days could be spent on the beach. We did that until mid-August when we needed to adjust our plans. One reason was that M got unexpectedly “homesick” for our house and a “normal” routine. The other was because our Peanut 🐶💜 was growing an abscess that needed operating on – they found a thorn stuck in her!

So, we have been back home in Italy since mid-August surviving the heat and trying to create “normal”, though we’ve had friends staying as we thought we were going to be away and they were our cat-sitters.

This week, though, the weather looks like it has turned. Big thunderstorms passed over us and dropped the temperatures. Now, the days are sunny staying under that 85F/30C range, which makes me a very happy camper!

Living in Japan made me appreciate the seasons more than I think I would have had I lived anywhere else. Most especially, fall/autumn became one of my favorite seasons. First, there is the relief that is felt from the dissipation of the summer heat. Then, there is the food that comes out in the fall! OMG, the food!

Although I might have to return to taking some allergy tablets to fight off the autumnal pollen, it is more than worth it for the rest of what the season brings. Here’s to a lovely next few months into the stretch toward the end of the year – already!!!

~T 🔥🐉♋️

On the way to 108

Going Mental No Responses »

Aug 282023

So, today I finished 70 sun salutations for Day 16 of my 28-day challenge to build up to 108 in one go. I wrote when I was starting it two weeks ago.

When I woke up this morning, I was feeling keen. I thought to myself that it’s only another 38 rounds to the full amount and so I could surely get them done and I’d have fulfilled my challenge. Well, by the time I got to the mat and had done about 10, I was rethinking my eager self. At round 45, I began to consider whether or not I would even reach the 70 for the day. By round 60, I felt content that I was nearly done and had stuck to my schedule feeling good about the next session tomorrow.

It was interesting to observe my thoughts as I went from eager beaver to doubting Thomas to happy pappy modes.

What I have observed so far in this process is that there is a discipline required and I am building that skill.

The discipline to get on the mat every day, except the rest days, and to keep to the somewhat arbitrary schedule is a test of fortitude and mental strength. Of course, there is also the physical well-being. My ankle is benefiting for the most part as long as I don’t go too fast or hard. I have to respect the motions. My back is less pleased with the movements so that I have to modify on some rounds or for a set of them to give it a bit of a break. However, this gives me a beginner’s mind in considering how to teach these poses for someone who is not able to do them. The rest of my body is going just fine. I see my shoulders and arms toning back up. I see my bum lifting. I am waiting for my stomach to join the party, but there’s still time.

Most importantly, though, I feel good. It has become a nice routine to get up and spend an hour in my own headspace moving my body. Six months ago, this would have been considered a luxury, so I am thankful to my body for its healing and my mind for its strength.

So, only another 12 days to go with two rest days in there to go!!! I’ve totally got this! 💪🏽

~T 🔥🐉♋️

The Chaos Pendulum

Going Mental No Responses »

Aug 212023

Life is very good. People who do not know us or our history have told us that they can never imagine being able to live as we do. People who do not know us or our history think that what we have now was easy to obtain–for us. People who do not know us or our history think that I am a “princess” and M is a “saint”.

Let me emphasize, these are people who do not know us or our history.

Just six years ago, we arrived in Japan nearly penniless having borrowed money from M’s daughter to pay for our plane tickets out of the UAE with only a faint hope that starting over would be how we were going to rebuild our finances and our lives. Thanks to our dear friends and the blessings of the Universe, we were able to find a place to live, and survived on about 15USD a day. For a month, we made the best of it until M’s first paycheck. Slowly, we made progress–moving into a house, increasing our daily spending, I finally started working, and then little by little life became easier.

Then, the pandemic happened. We willingly and consciously decided to uproot ourselves and move continents–again.

Although we were not in the same position as when we arrived in Japan, we were not in the best of positions when we left. Still, life is short and we are eternal optimists (well, me less so than M 😝).

So, we arrived in Europe with a few more pennies in our pocket (and we paid for our own flights 😅), and smarter about how we went about our days. M’s business was taking off so much so that he could quit his other work. I was only working freelance, but for a lot less money. Still, we were on the upside again.

We moved to Italy and found our dream home. Feeling on top of the world, we agreed to a crazy plan to buy the house.

Then, the markets crashed.

Another year of stress came to us as we considered how to ensure we weren’t homeless and penniless–again. Yet, we made it through.

What people see now is the results of all of the above. Keep in mind that’s just the abbreviated version! The fact is that life is full of ups and downs. I consider my husband to be like a walking energy tornado who has a knack of creating chaos. Yet, somehow he makes magic with it. Plus, to give myself some credit, he has me to bring balance to the pendulum. I make sure the pendulum swings are not so extreme anymore–or at least, that is the goal. 🤪

The point is that no one’s life is easy no matter how it may look on the outside. Seeing a slice of the pie doesn’t mean that the other side is still intact or pretty. While we naturally will judge what we can see or want to see, I remind myself and us that we have no idea what’s on the inside of a person or a relationship or a situation. Also, the seemingly perfect can become less than so in a blink of eye so nothing should ever be taken for granted. 😇

In any case, I am enjoying the upswing of the pendulum and am thankful every day that this is my life. 💜

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Importance of Fluidity

Going Mental 2 Responses »

Aug 182023

As someone who is a lover of planning and a general stickler for organizing, I amaze myself when I can be fluid – if I may toot my own horn. 😝

While we were gone, Peanut had to get a surgical procedure done to release a growing abscess. Our sitters were stars in helping out with her and doing her follow-up care. So, when we arrived back home, we had thought the pups 🐶🐶 would be fine to accompany us back to France for a couple more weeks as we have friends coming to stay and they were going to enjoy the house as their own in exchange for taking care of the cats. 🐈🐈‍⬛.

Obviously, it was not to be.

I think M used his strong powers of attraction to ensure that we stay home as he has been a little “homesick” and wanting to be in his own space for the past month. 🤪 So, Peanut’s abscess is returning and needs to head to Rome for a proper scan to see what the source of the infection is. Then, Monty decided to see what it’s like to be a three-legged animal for a bit with a hurt paw that the vet says is probably a chipped bone that can only be rested and watched. Therefore, we are staying put now instead of continuing our summer period in France – though, we may still go for a few days depending on Pea’s recovery status.

When I think about the mental flexibility that is required to stay fluid with our plans, I give myself a pat on the back because normally I would have booked and paid for things already so that we’d have to lose the money or reschedule or stress about what is best to do. Unfortunately, it affirms my husband’s more spontaneous aka chaotic ways as “the right ones” (as he likes to say) with which I 95% disagree. Still, I see the value and importance of allowing for fluidity in plans and life. There are lessons and silver linings that can be found in the experience.

In truth, I am also OK with it because I’ve suddenly gotten a ton of work, want to work on my writing, and some other projects are about to begin. So, it’s helpful to be stable and in one place again for all of this. 😁

However, being fluid also means things could change tomorrow! 😝 So, stay tuned! 😅

~T 🔥🐉♋️

28 Days to 108 Sun Salutations

Going Mental No Responses »

Aug 142023

So, I needed something to prepare myself for an online yoga class that I have agreed to teach *live* weekly. I must have been feeling weak in my desire to do something a bit more meaningful when I agreed to do it. 🤪

In any case, to ensure that my ankle is up for it and that my body is in decent shape before I go on camera in front of a yet unknown number of students, I thought it would be good to start a challenge over the next month I have to prep for it. The fact that I haven’t actually “taught” a yoga class in a few years is not daunting at all… 😬😜

I’m sure like most things, it’ll come back quickly. Plus, I’ll practice. 😅

To help me with this endeavor, I recruited my BFF who I know loves a “challenge” kind of activity. Therefore, we have started a 28-day challenge to complete 108 sun salutations (A) in one-go. After having done day 2 today, I feel it shouldn’t be so hard. My ankle seems happy with it so far and I do not yet feel as if I have reached my fitness limit yet. We shall see how I feel in another few days.

For now, though, it’s a bit of fun and motivation to build up my routine and do something with someone else at the same time. 🙏🏽❤️

Wish me luck! 😅

~T 🔥🐉♋️

A Bit of Holiday in Western France

Going Mental, Meanderings Abroad No Responses »

Aug 082023

Although our lives are admittedly in the realm of “every day is a holiday”, we did take a week to really be on holiday. M has always wanted to surf in the Atlantic, so we headed that direction from our place in the Var, France.

To break up the journey a bit, we revisited a few places that we had been to before when we first got together and M brought me to France for the first time to see if I would like it here. Remember, this was always meant to be our “final destination” – that was before Italy hit our radar. So, we stopped for a night in Carcassonne, which is a wonderful medieval town. We stayed within the castle walls this time as well, which was rather amazing.

From there, we headed for our almost week-long stay in Biarritz. This is a well-known seaside town for surfing and seafood. It was a great town even if the weather did not cooperate for the entire time. We still got a few days of surfing 🏄‍♂️ (for M) and beach bumming (for me) in before a storm came through with wind and rain that made the waves 🌊 too big for those who care about their lives. 🤪 We probably could have stayed one or two fewer nights there, but it did give us a chance to explore around a bit more.

One day, we drove into Spain to visit San Sebastián. It was a bit too grey to fully appreciate, but it was still a cute seaside town as well. Of course, us being as fickle as we are briefly considered whether or not it was somewhere we could live. Fortunately, neither of us were overly enamored with that particular place, so we said no. 😅 However, it was nice to hear some Spanish and feel the flair for a couple of hours.

On our way back, we stopped in a town called Espelette – famous for its pimentos 🌶️ . Apparently, it’s one of the only places that these can grow in France due to its particular climate at the bottom of the Pyrenees mountains 🏔️ . So, we explored the town and, of course, bought some pepper products. 😬

I’ll try to get some more pictures posted soon, but am still editing at the moment as my vacation-mode has not yet fully turned off. 😜

~T 🔥🐉♋️

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