Beautiful America

 Going Mental  2 Responses »
Nov 162022
 

It’s been less than a week since being back on American soil and visiting home.

It is so nice to be amongst those with whom I am most comfortable and those who know me best. Even though I have not been home to visit for five years, it has felt as if I haven’t been gone that long. At the same time, I feel as if I have always been gone. I know… confusing, eh? I’ll address more on that at a later date.

Consumerism is my measurement of happiness since being back. It is not that I necessarily need anything, but it is somehow joyful to have the ability to find varieties of spices, clothes, electronics, etc. etc. with little-to-no stress in wondering where such things could be obtained or understanding the details of such products.

One of the most amazing things I have found is the size and quantity of products for low prices. For example, in Italy (and most European countries) over-the-counter drugs are only available at a pharmacy, which sort of contradicts the whole OTC concept, and they are not necessarily very cheap. So, when I found a bottle of 500 capsules of ibuprofen for a mere $7.99, I was gleeful to know I won’t have to make a trip to a pharmacy, where it costs about $5 for 10 capsules, for a while.

Also, it is no wonder that many/most Americans are overweight with so much super-plus sized food items like potato chips bags, sweets, etc. at a fairly low price.

Still, the convenience of finding everything both within and beyond the imagination is a dream when coming from a place where products are limited, more challenging to find, and all in a foreign language space. So, the symbol of Americanism in the consumption of products is well-appreciated right now.

Before you shake your head at my encouragement of globalization, greed, and the like, I have not just been focusing on the things I can buy. I also have taken in the scenes of beautiful evergreen trees and farm fields with animals or agricultural plants. It is nice to see wide open spaces and a different kind of green than what I normally see.

While Italy does have luscious green hills, it is that of new grass fields. Trees surround our house, but they do not have the same height and stature. Although Italy is a much older country, there is still something aged and wise in the trees that fill the neighborhood where I have been doing my run-walks.

So, while there is craziness in politics or society’s trajectory that does not make America so beautiful, there is much for this visiting citizen to find wonderful so far. 🤪

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Journey Home

 Going Mental  1 Response »
Nov 102022
 

Every now and then, I return to previous thoughts. This one is one of them, but perhaps from a different perspective point.

There is a line in one of my favorite movies that I often consider relatable on many levels to my own way of thinking and place in this world. 

Jo says “I love our home, but I’m just so fitful and I can’t stand being here! … There’s just something really wrong with me.”

Her wise mother replies with “Oh, Jo. Jo, you have so many extraordinary gifts; how can you expect to lead an ordinary life? You’re ready to go out and – and find a good use for your talent. Tho’ I don’t know what I shall do without my Jo. Go, and embrace your liberty. And see what wonderful things come of it.”

I feel as if this exchange of feelings gave me permission to embrace the life path that I have chosen. 

As I am on the way home again after five years of complete absence due to C19 and moving countries. Strangely enough I still call the place of my family as “home”. I also call the house with my partner as home. 

Still, even with both, I often find myself with that sentiment of not fully wanting/needing to be there. 

So I am both excited and curious as to how I will feel being back in the US of A. A place that has been the source of news, drama, division, and derision around the world over the past few years. Yet, like anywhere, when on the ground and in the life everything else seems distant and over-hyped. 

Mostly, I hope that I have made the most of my liberty though I’m not yet sure I’ve found a use – or even identified – my talent(s), but I most definitely am embracing the journey. 

~T 🔥🐉♋️

In the clouds

 Writing  No Responses »
Nov 062022
 

When we are above the clouds
The sun shines and the sea of white 
Rolls to eternity 

The soft pillows of fluff lay the ground
For the angels to roam and play 
It is a small piece of heaven that 
We can touch 

In a plane 
In our dreams

Inevitably we must descend 
The puffs stretch into wisps 
Then turbulence hits
As our view becomes blocked

We are blinded into a fog
No end can be seen 
We can only bounce around
Bumping along waiting for the eventual clearing 

Then we pass through 
Our fears of the unknown no longer legitimate 
For we continue to fly
Soaring toward our destination with relief
With excitement 

The clouds that were just below 
Are now above
Their cover is a promise
As the angels look down 
Like a blanket and lid of protection 

We continue on 
Leaving the clouds for 
Another day 

~T October 26, 2022

Today’s Joy – well, in January 2021…

 Going Mental  1 Response »
Nov 012022
 
Found it!

**This is the original part of the post that somehow didn’t get published…**

Since the finalization of the election results (before the January 6th formalities), I have had this countdown on my home tab of my browser. Each day there is a saying to consider philosophically along with a beautiful picture.

Most of the time, I take for granted the phrases and just pause to take in the image as I go about my online activities for the day.

However, today seemed rather fitting “Find your joy” on the day that He’s OUT! 👏🏽

It has been four long dark years in the world of politics. 🌑 Darker than usual since politics can be generally irritating and dark on the best of days. However, from the disbelief of his election win that followed the disbelief of Brexit, the world has continued to spiral into chaos. 🌪💥 Although the world probably needed this shake up to bring to light many of the issues that we had been happily turning a blind eye to such as systemic racism, immigration problems, and international dependence on the US to lead in many aspects of the global concerns, it has come at a great price.

My hope is that now the blinders are off and we will use our new awakening to focus on the good and humane; that we will do what humans do best and unite to build an even better and stronger world than before the dark four years. 🤞🏽

I suppose only history will tell us what has been gained or lost with a more certain objective view. However, in the moment of today, I am sighing in relief 😥 and smiling with hope 😅 of a much brighter future. My patriotism still stands firm, 🇺🇸 whether misguided or not, but it is not at all costs. There is a lot riding on what comes out of the burning ashes that have been aflame the last 1,827 days. But, I choose to believe that, like the mythical phoenix, 🎉 the nation will rise to be even stronger and better than before.

So, today, I find joy in the fact that we are about to see the first person of color and female Vice-President 🙌🏽 and plans are already in motion to rebuild with a sense of humanity and goodness. 🙏🏽 Welcome to President Biden and Vice-President Harris! 💞

**New part of the post… TODAY November 1, 2022**

I’m beginning the process of “cleaning house” as I prepare to take stock for the year and get affairs in order. Sometimes when I consider what to share on this blog, I start pieces to help guide me later. There are also times when I start a post on another device and then forget to publish them or something or other. This one seems to be an example of one that got lost in the files – and quite a long time ago.

Yet, I felt that it was reasonably good timing to bring it back out and finally hit “publish” on it since I am mentally preparing to return to the US for three weeks. Also, the little that I do keep up with politics and news has revealed that in the coming weeks while I am visiting my family, the good ol’ former P will be back on the TV screen with his potential subpoena to Congress regarding his involvement with the Jan 6 incident. 😬

Despite many in and out of the US who keep up with the domestic drama saying how much of a sh*t show it is 😵‍💫, I have done my best to stay away from knowing too much or engaging in what I deem to be pointless conversation around it. However, it has also been very easy for me to sort of bury my head in the sand because I live away from just about everything. So, it is with a little bit of anxiety that I prepare to return to the US again post-pandemic, post-beginning of hate crimes, post-expression of anti-Asian sentiments, etc. While I want to hope for the best, I somewhat expect the worst even though Portland, Oregon is fairly liberal in the city, the more rural areas are not so much.

I consider myself pretty open-minded and though I would say I am liberal thinking, I have some pretty conservative opinions on certain topics. Still, I am Asian. I am anti-establishment. I am anti-authority/power at my personal expense. I am anti-coercion/bullying. I am pro-choice. I am pro-freedom of expression, thought, orientation, and individuality. How will this all play in and out when I am in mixed crowds? 🤔 I do not know. 🤷🏽‍♀️

So, I am focusing on the excitement and love for seeing family and friends. 🙏🏽 Hopefully, there’ll be nothing else to report back here to the contrary. 😜

~T 🔥🐉♋️

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