I wrote this as a draft for another article I was going to submit, but realized it was a bit too personal to share on a non-affiliated space. 🤷🏽♀️ There is some repeat from an earlier post last week, but in any case, I thought I’d put it here for record-keeping and, well, this IS an affiliated space for my personal musings. 😝 Also, as this is the sum of my reflections for my regular new year’s planning as I’ll take a wee break from writing for a week or so, consider it my 2023 resolutions post. ❤️
To be perfectly honest, my reflective behavior is usually focused on myself and only myself. 😜 Although this might sound enviable (or extremely self-centered) to many who struggle to embrace self-care, self-awareness, positive self-talk, etc., it really isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.
For me, my introspective nature is an attempt to better myself as a member of society, a participant in my community of friends, a wife to my husband, a daughter to my parents, a sister to my brother, a writer to my unknown readers, and a representative to my fellow humans. In this attempt at self-improvement, as defined by the transcendentalists of 19th century America, comes a sense of exhaustion – quite the opposite to the goal our 21st century idea of “self -” promotes.
So, as I reflect on the past year or so with the return of an adjusted-way-of-life post-COVID19, I am setting new goals for the next year – to be more SELFish. WHAT?! (a collective gasp might be heard).
I know – controversial, right?
Let me clarify from the start, I will never be selfish to the point that it hurts another individual or at the expense of another human being (or animal, for that matter). It is not in my nature to be intentionally harmful to others; thus, it would not actually be selfish for me to behave in such a manner. Rather, what I mean is that my actions and activities this year are going to be focused on what benefits me as a person. Instead of reflecting on how my actions, thoughts, or words might be perceived or affected by others, I am going to consider how they affect me first and foremost.
An example of how this will play out is in my writing. For years, I have been writing for my own private audience of one – me! Although I do have public spaces like social media or a blog (or two or three), I do not advertise them outside of a subtle link on a profile page. In general, I prefer to work quietly from behind the scenes such as on The Universal Asian or my Medium page. However, this year, I will be focusing on building up my own space as OSH, where I’ll be sharing my own writing, services for Book Coaching and Editing, plus a subscription-based newsletter called OSH’s Letters where I will write to subscribers and share my worldview on the day-to-day experiences discovered on my journey through living on this planet. Much of the latter is still in the works, but do feel free to check the spaces often or go ahead and subscribe on the form provided to stay updated. See how my selfish act(s) work here – a shameless plug for my site(s), but no harm done, right?!
Other ways that this selfishness will play out for me is going to be in spending more time doing yoga and meditating regularly. Although this falls into a ‘self-care’ category, I also treat it as a self-ish time out for only me. It may be at the expense of others in terms of my available time to them, but rather than seeing it as harmful, I consider it helpful that there will be boundaries and by me taking this time for myself, I can be more present and purposeful when I do give others my time.
Also, I’m taking a page out of Tim Ferriss’s Four-Hour Workweek: Life is now and I can live the lifestyle of a millionaire without having to actually be one – though I wouldn’t complain if that happened! Basically, after a summer as a revolving door of visitors to our new home in Italy, I am closing our open-door policy so that we can have time to travel ourselves. Although I fully enjoyed our visits, it was draining and we did not get to do our own exploring of places. Therefore, doors will still be open, just on a more structured timeline.
So, you see, it’s not that self is to be hyphenated this year, but rather it just is itSELF.
Here’s to an amazing year to the SELF.
~T 🔥🐉♋️
