Escapism is one of my coping mechanisms for getting through life. When reality is too much, the world of a book, a different culture, a cafe, or a new environment of some kind can serve to justify the escape.
While it might be easy to explain it away as something positive, the truth is that there is a darkness below the layers of disguise.
It is not necessarily a consuming shadow, but recently it was suggested to me that I might be running away—from the good benefits of regular physio or yoga sessions that are advantageous to my back pain, from the idea of a settled mind, from establishing friendships and roots….
Although I am not certain it is that deep, I am giving it some space in my head to ponder.
Mostly, I think that we just planned a lot of travel that has caught up with us both physically and mentally. For me, my spine issues were not part of the life plan, so activities addressing the issues around my physical health had to take a secondary role for now. At the same time, I refuse to live life as a chronically ill or restrained individual. Life, as I want it to be, will continue no matter any physical conditions that arise. There’s plenty of time later in life to sit still.
That being said, there is nothing wrong with taking a moment to pause and think about these words. Is there resonance in them? Am I escaping the message that may be sent via these others’ words? Or, am I just fine and merely a sounding board for their own opinions or ideas that apply to their own lives?
Whatever the case may be, it is not important as to how or why these thoughts and words have blown in my direction. They have been received. They are being considered. Any revelations that arise will be taken on board for future adjustments.
In the meantime, we have a lot of escaping ahead for the remainder of the calendar year and I will enjoy it fully. Still, I am also planning next year and how to be more present in our home and community. So, stay tuned as reflection and adjustments sprinkle the air.
~T🔥🐉♋️
