May 202021
 

Yes, pictures are coming, but saving that post for when I have fewer words to share. πŸ˜…

M went on a trip for mostly business, but a little pleasure (for both of us) this week. He left on Tuesday afternoon and returns on Saturday evening.

His original plans were to combine a stop in Spain and Brussels, but the Spain portion got moved, so rather than cancel or limit the Brussels portion, he extended it. Plus, then he’ll still go to Spain next week. πŸ™ŒπŸ½

Now, I’m not going to lie. When the trips were planned initially, I was not for it as the timing was less than ideal. Panic and PTSD rose in me so that my poor husband thought that I wouldn’t let him go at all – ever. He had forgotten that I have been dying for some solitude, quiet, and independence for months – 16 in fact.

However, the timing coincided with having to move out of our rental and head to Italy thereafter along with the fact that I still do not have more than a number to legitimize my being in a foreign country. I think I had a fair point on why he shouldn’t be traipsing off. Though, I probably could have expressed with less drama and emotion, but well… it’s done. πŸ€ͺ

So, when we found out that we had to return to France πŸ‡«πŸ‡· anyway, I was more open to the idea of him going off for a few days – more like ecstatic! 🀣 Even though it meant coming back a bit earlier and paying more money for a place, it has been more than worth it!

While we have ridden out the past year plus quite well and our love remains fully intact, there is a lot to be said for a bit of time apart. Before, I could enjoy quiet moments at home most days with M off to work at his office. Then, we started sharing workspace. Our styles greatly differ by the nature of our work, but also by who we are as individuals. Although he, as an extrovert, wasn’t able to see others and charge up in that way, he could still refill his batteries by venting on the phone, Zoom, etc. Unfortunately, this does not work for an introvert, who needs silence and alone time to recharge. My batteries have been running on low for 16 months…. 16 …

It’s only been two days, but already I can feel a sense of myself again. I have made sure that I see friends each day so that I don’t completely close up into my shell, but my batteries are charging reminding me of who I am when full.

With about two more days to go, I will continue to recharge but also take the opportunity to think about how to bring back the balance for myself once M is back. It’s not like he can go away every week – nor do I really want him to -, but the importance of making sure I can recharge better has been noted. πŸ˜‡

~T πŸ˜€

May 162021
 

Bonjour from France again! πŸ‡«πŸ‡·

So… the Universe heard my pangs of frustration and loneliness by providing us with our plan of action for Phase II Part 1 and 2.

Part 1 Recap

I already covered most of Part 1 in the previous post. We ate as a coping mechanism, but thankfully it was only one real meal a day in early afternoon applying daily intermittent fasting so that our bodies could use as much time as possible to digest the tasty offerings of the Italian cuisine.

Basically, our visa situation both got simpler and more complicated at the same time. Our Internet woes were only really remedied by taking advantage of cafe culture, which generally works best for me anyway, but isn’t as good for running an online magazine as my big screen iMac. πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈ

Our plan to move to a bigger place has become reality, only in a different country….

Part 2 – The Visa

It seems that the procurement of the mystical Type-D visa is reasonably straightforward from the Italian embassy. Since our last “residency” is considered France, thanks to M’s ability to get it swiftly and my dependency (not so thankful), we think we don’t have to consider the US aspect for me.

Although we were led to believe that we could simply go to Nice, which isn’t far from where I wanted to be based anyway, to be near my friends, we learned that thanks to the Pandemic C, all consulates have been closed and the only place we can do this visa processing is through Paris.

The upside is that we get to visit Paris. It’s a city that I’m not all that enamored with after visiting it once on my own for a few days in a very cold and wet November a few years back. M loves the charm, which I deem cliche and over-hyped. So, he is determined to show me the reason why it is considered a city of love πŸ‘©β€β€οΈβ€πŸ’‹β€πŸ‘¨ …. We shall see. 😜

Unfortunately, the earliest appointment we could get is for June 10th. This is about a month away. Luckily, the consulate is communicating quickly and clearly via email, so I feel a bit more at ease with that.

So, why are we in France now?

Well, M has to travel around the EU for work. Now that the borders are open again with just a negative PCR, he is eager to go away. As it has been about 15 months since we spent a night apart, I’m equally eager for him to go away. πŸ˜‰

Since M wants to travel and I really cannot go across borders unless by car, where the likelihood of being checked is slimmer, (have done two crossings now and not been stopped 🀞🏽) I felt that it was safer for me to be in France should anything happen as at least I am in the system here for my residency application. Plus, I have friends here and can speak some of the language. I could not say the same for the tiny town that we were living in; and the dark stone-walled apartment that I would end up hiding away was not conducive to stability in my mental health, which is a bit on edge as it is with the stress all of this is applying to my carefully constructed sanity. 🀹🏽

Therefore, we have rented a lovely place near where we were before (and my friends) for the next six weeks. At the time that we rented, we didn’t know that it would be possible to get our visa on the same day as the appointment as we had heard it could take a couple of weeks. So, we wanted to be safe….

We will have to be out the day before my birthday, so am not sure what we will do as that is a long way away and our plans are ever-changing. However, I am already a million times happier having only been here for about four hours. I’ve got my friends on notice and plans in motion. πŸ’ƒπŸ½πŸ₯‚

I’ll share some photos next time. For now, I’m just reveling with lighter air! ✨

~T πŸ˜€

Apr 272021
 

Six months ago, we landed in France planning to rent for a few months and then finding a place to put down roots long-term.

As life continues to remind me, most things rarely go as planned…. First, there is COVID with lockdowns and difficulties in being able to explore areas. Then, there is a lack of knowing exactly what we want. More importantly, there is the Footner element that requires fluidity and flexibility in any type of planning.

It doesn’t mean that there isn’t eventually follow-through, it just means that the timing and commitment to a decision may not happen as one (I) might prefer/desire/hope/dream!

Therefore, for various reasons, we leave on Sunday for what I’m now calling Phase II of our European settlement adventure.

Where are we going?

We will be heading to a small town in the province of Umbria, Italy.

Why are we going there?

Well, the short answer is because we paid a good chunk of cash to ensure that we can get visas. Although, by some weird twist of fate, M has already gotten his French visa, I have yet to hear anything regarding mine. My “free” 90-days stay has long passed, which causes me a bit of strife even though I do have a registration number and can be here as a former EU citizen’s spouse. However, the complications of Brexit, etc. make me less comfortable with those mere threads of bureaucratic legitimacy, so off to Italy we go where I already have an agreement for a residency visa there for at least the next five years – renewable.

What does that mean exactly?

It means that we have to have a ‘residence’ in Italy to legitimize the visa and all other paperwork and status comes through Italy instead of France, as we had originally planned. Thus, we need to head to Italy for a month or so to get the paperwork done and to move forward with our settling in Europe. We have a place rented, though we may find a larger space as our aim is to have a “winter” home there as well as an address to send our stuff that is still in Japan. There are worse things to plan, I’m sure! πŸ˜›

I have made M promise that we are coming back to this area of France as my new friends are here and I don’t want to just disappear. Though, he has put some typically “Footner” twists into the Phase III plans, but since those could change by the time I finish this post, I won’t bother to put it down into print just yet. πŸ˜‰

So, Europe Phase I has been lovely and definitely worth the Japan departure six months ago. My French is coming along fairly well, though I have started an online class to improve my speaking and listening. I figured it was a good time to do so since I’ll be away from any chance of being exposed to it while in Italy and I don’t plan to learn more than a few words in Italian so as not to get too comfortable!

~T πŸ˜€

May 262020
 

A while back one of my relatives on Facebook posted a video of this father-daughter duo singing “The Prayer”, which is one of my favorite songs.

For years, we have watched Claire and Dave Crosby sing. The cuteness factor along with the sweet naivety of a daughter looking up to her father were the main draw. We still enjoy watching them out of nostalgia, but the talent level is in a growing phase….

Therefore, the real beauty of The Shaws is that the talent between the two of them is pure. Also, the start of their fame has come from the basic desire of just wanting to sing. Even as you listen to their Q&A session (above), there is such humility and joy in what they are doing.

It reminds me of the joy I used to have singing. While I let myself be held back by my own shyness, fear, and introvertedness as a youth, I always felt free and peaceful when singing. Of course, I could still join a choir or sing more formally, but that’s not of interest at the moment.

Still, I think the joy of turning on some beautiful tunes, belting them out with all of my might creates a purity in the soul. So, maybe it’s time to blast the speakers and let it out! πŸ˜€

~T πŸ˜€

May 192020
 

If you look at my Facebook friends numbers, it says 914 as of today. One might think that I am a social butterfly with numbers like that.

However, it just goes to show how much numbers can be used to express, or give the perception of, something that is quite far from the truth.

Initially, I was going to write this post regarding my preference for just a few friends rather than many, but as I sat to write my mind drifted to the more current matter of how numbers are being used to try to convince people to “fall in line” with societal pressures to stay at home and socially distance themselves from others.

This morning, I read that to create prosperity we have to study about money (Rules of Wealth). In doing so, we learn the lingo and language, lifestyle and way of thinking that people with money, or who understand money, use to be wealthy.

The academic in me wholeheartedly embraces this advice. The anti-news consumer in me wholeheartedly rejects this advice. Somewhere in the middle is the skeptic who says that maybe it is true that if I don’t follow this advice I will limit my prosperity, but perhaps it also doesn’t hurt to learn a little bit and expand my knowledge base.

Most strongly, though, is my issue with numbers. Every day, we read about the latest numbers for the newly infected, deaths, and those hospitalized due to COVID-19. Now, these numbers can only reflect one piece of the bigger picture. Our attention has been trained to focus solely on the illness itself. Only this week have I started to hear discussion in the media regarding people’s livelihoods. Suddenly, with unemployment benefit applications rising to nearly a quarter of the US population there is interest in numbers related to the economy, households, etc.

The media is now going to force people to apply their emotional responses to the sad stories of those who are struggling because of the global shutdown. However, my issue is why wasn’t there some forethought applied before when decisions were made to blow numbers out of proportion scaring people into believing that it was a social responsibility to stay at home and close down the world? Where was the sense of social responsibility when it came to ensuring that people could pay bills, put food on their tables, and feel secure in being able to provide basic needs for themselves and their families?

I know I already ranted about this before, but when thinking about numbers again, I am amazed at the lack of desirability for the powers that be to make one to one correlations. I am amazed at how little skepticism is applied to what high numbers represent.

Just because my Facebook says I have 914 friends, does not make a one to one reality that they are all actually my friends.

It doesn’t seem like we need basic math(s) for that….

~T πŸ˜€

May 122020
 

A month has flown by!

The last time I wrote, we were just going into the State of Emergency (SoE) within a few prefectures, then all of Japan was brought under the declaration. Despite the initial plan to return to life as we knew it by May 6th – after the Japanese Golden Week(end) holidays -, we found ourselves with an unsurprising extension until the end of the month.

Even then, there’s no certainty that the SoE will be lifted in Tokyo as the government has set a target of reducing exposure, measured by train use (I think), by 70-80%. Although Golden Week was relabeled as “Stay At Home Week”, it seems that people are getting restless despite the reported numbers.

With the weather warming up and people finding it more and more challenging to stay inside every day, I am not confident that the lofty target will ever be reached.

As the rest of the world starts to reassess, I find myself wondering what it was all for. Some may not want to believe in conspiracy theories, and I’m no lover of them either, but I absolutely do not believe that government actions on a global scale such as we have seen was done over something only slightly worse than SARS.

Now, I’m not a scientist. I’m not even reading up on it. I’m not up-to-date on political actions or economies domestic or abroad. I care very very little for any of these things. In fact, in all honesty, I care very little for the numbers touting millions of cases of infection or 286 thousand plus deaths (7% of those infected).

I’m a big believer in the fact that our planet is massively over-populated and that the Universal Earth is probably letting us know this directly since slowly warming up the planet and highlighting the loss of flora and fauna hasn’t been effective. I’m also a believer in the Darwinian theory of survival of the fittest.

I know it’s not politically correct anymore to think this way. I know it sounds harsh and lacking in compassion. However, my response is, get over your emotions and look at this rationally and with logic.

This virus is not randomly killing people at unimaginable rates. Instead, there are known factors as to who gets infected. There are known factors as to why people die. There are also known factors as to how it can be spread.

Therefore, logically and rationally speaking, global national lock downs preventing people from working to support theirs and their families’ livelihoods is absolutely mind-bogglingly stupid. From my own experience, I know that it takes but a blink of an eye to become financially destitute. Not knowing how you are going to eat or pay rent or any bills is beyond stressful – more stressful than worrying about catching a virus that may or may not kill you. Then, the building back up, paying back debt, and getting back on one’s feet can take years – if at all possible.

In fact, the thought of dying by one’s own hands is a higher risk than getting sick.

So, again, I ask you, what is the reason behind all of this?

How did we become a society where the minority dictates and rules the actions of the majority? When did the majority determine that they should be ruled by illogical and emotional rationalizations?

My guess?

Privilege.

I’m not talking just about white people, though they are the majority. But, there are plenty of privileged people of color spouting the same messages.

“Stay at Home” / “We are in it together” / “It’s not about you, it’s about saving lives” / “Wear a mask because you care about other people”

These are words of the privileged. These are words of those who are still getting paid every week or month in their jobs. These are words of those who have enough money to carry on their everyday lives. These are words of those who are healthy. These are words of those who already live apart from others. These are words of those who do not have to worry.

The privileged are not debating whether or not they have the ability to stay at home away from others and their jobs. The privileged are not in it together with those who are struggling to put food on the table. The privileged are not forced to think about how to save their own lives. The privileged are not caring about other people, but themselves and their loved ones.

Now, I know I am privileged. I am getting paid regularly and I love working from home. I am healthy, though less so from being home all day. I also am lucky that as an introvert, I am living my best life right now.

My husband is not. (Obviously, he’s still privileged because he has me as a wife! πŸ˜› )

However, we both know what it is like to struggle and have to rebuild. That was in “normal” times.

Again, there is no rational reason for the lock downs, shut downs, put downs.

It should be our choice whether or not to expose ourselves just as we do every year when flu season hits. (Yes, I do understand this is NOT the same as the annual flu.) It should be our choice as to whether or not our financial status is good or bad based on our own decisions – not the governments or my neighbors’.

We need to remember that people are whole people. We need to make room to allow people to make their own decisions and to know what is best for them and their families. We need to be free and prosper as we see fit.

This… this is absolutely inexplicably unacceptable….

~T :/

May 312019
 

Share one line of your own writing

Seems like one line is not enough….

Today is the end of the #whyshewriteschallenge and I must say that I’ve enjoyed it overall. It also served to push me into writing and sharing more.

So, really for the last 31 days I have been sharing my writing as this is the general way I write for general consumption.

Readers are welcome to read through the blog for the time being. I’ll be working on sharing more writing in general now that the habit is formed. πŸ˜‰

~T πŸ˜€

May 302019
 

How do you support other women writers?

Initially, my answer to this was that I really don’t. 🀭

However, after a bit more thought, πŸ€”I realized that the best way that I can support any writer is by reading her writing. πŸ€“

I enjoy reading a variety of books from Danielle Steel, Nora Roberts to Laura Ingalls Wilder to Ayn Rand, Margaret Atwood, Elizabeth Gilbert to, of course, the classics with Jane Austen, Bronte sisters, and so many more. πŸ‘©πŸ½β€πŸ«

To me, the best way to support any writer ✍🏽is to read their words. After all, that is the main purpose of any writer – I imagine….

So, there it is! 🀩

~T πŸ˜€

May 292019
 

What is your writing goal this year?

At the beginning of the year, I avoided publicly sharing any goals for this year so that I did not feel disappointed by the end of it. πŸ˜…

Also, that way no one could point out if I missed something – not that anyone keeps track of my life, or wants to, as much as I do. 😜

Still, I do make them. And, I did set them in writing too. However, I have to accept that ‘real life’ gets in the way of my dream one. πŸ™„

On the bright side, the year is only half over so there is still time to reach my goals or adjust them accordingly. πŸ˜‰

So, I have decided that I can achieve the following:

*☝🏽Draft volume 1 of The Universal Asian and/or update the blog

*✌🏽Aim to participate in November’s NaNoWriMo as a way of helping get the above πŸ‘†πŸ½done. πŸ˜‰

*🀟🏽Continue staying up with posting here now that I’ve redeveloped a habit for it.

These seem manageable. Feel free to keep me accountable! πŸ’ͺ🏽

~T πŸ˜€

May 282019
 

If you had one writer wish, what would it be?

I’m not quite sure how to answer this, but I suppose I can interpret it however I like.

My wish for my writing is to touch people. Whether it is to make them laugh πŸ˜‚, ponder πŸ€” the world 🌎, feel angry 😑 at a different opinion, or just open their eyes πŸ‘€ to something new, I am happy.

Sure, like any writer who calls themselves such, I would like to be published more and sell well a novel. However, it doesn’t need to be a bestseller – though if I could be on Ellen or Oprah for it I wouldn’t complain. 😜

Mostly, I write for myself and hope that in doing so at least one other person out there connects with my words enough to know they are not alone in their experiences and walk on this planet we all share. πŸ’ž

Is that a wish? Hm….

~T πŸ˜€

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