We are officially on our summer holidays! ☀️🎉
Although, to be fair, it doesn’t look or feel that much different from our regular days since neither of us “work” all day long. Plus, M is always “working”, so even when on holiday he is messaging, fielding calls, etc.
Still, the environment has changed and we have plans to explore a bit more of France and some islands over the next couple of months.
Yet…it has a sort of odd feeling to it as well.
This week, M is in the UK on his own doing a mix of work and pleasure traveling. This means I am on my own in our place in Lorgues, but without the puppies. 🐶 🥺 It’s best for them that we were able to find a nice couple, we think, to house- and pet-sit for us. Despite that, I had this weird sense of anxiety yesterday when I dropped of M at the airport.
Perhaps, it was a little bit of residue from the last time he left me on my own as it resulted in my ankle-break. Perhaps, it is some premonition yet to be known. Or, perhaps, it is just a jumble of emotions that are brewing inside of me in quietly coping with different levels of stress as we prepared to leave for about a month.
This is the first time that we have left the dogs for such a long period of time. This is the first time we have strangers in our house for such a long period of time. This is the first time that we have started to live the life that we want in having a home-base, but still be free to come and go in our travels around.
So, I suppose it is natural that we/I have this anxiety. Possibly, M manifested his anxiety through work-stress while I have buried it within until now.
Yesterday, when I got back, I was exhausted. I just wanted to sleep without any disruptions or distractions. Although I had a dinner invite, I could not summon the energy to be sociable, try to speak French, stay awake. Even with a short afternoon nap that usually refreshes me for the late Mediterranean evening culture, I still could not find motivation. So, I stayed in – because I could! 🤪 I was in bed by 9 and probably asleep not that much later.
My sleep wasn’t great, but I was not awakened by anything other than my own alertness.
Thus, this week, I have planned to detox my body, reboot my physical health, and refresh my mind. I started this morning with an early walk and attempted a light job, which would be more aptly referred to as a fast-walk, but that’s OK. I prepped some lemon water, relaxed with my cup of coffee on the balcony, did some work, and am now already at the end of my to-do list for the day. Tonight will be my last solid food night for the week as I had already agreed to go out for unlimited tacos and rosé with music. Then, tomorrow, I go on my liquid detox of lemon water and smoothies to try to give my body a break from the booze and overeating.
To encourage myself, I have booked a couple of massages that also allow for a couple of hours at the spa as a way of mini-retreat treatments mixed in with a means of distraction from wanting to eat and of refreshing – one of my goals for the week.
So, I’ll be back towards the end of the week to let you know how it goes! 🙏🏽
~T 🔥🐉♋️