Third Book Out is Poetry

 Going Mental, Literary Escapes  No Responses »
Jul 122024
 

When I was eight-years-old, I moved in with the Bilyeus and decided I liked them enough to want to remember who they were in my life. Previous families were, and still are, a blur as nightmares or questionable realities of buried memories. So, it was then that my writing persona began.

At the time, I really only focused on journals and getting my page of writing in each day about what I had done, whether or not my brother was mean to me, thoughts about the current life I was living. It took me many years to accept that I was staying with this family and that I could call them mine.

Intermingled with all of that was poetry.

My mom was a unique mother in her lack of helicopter-parenting and reserved demeanor. I never really questioned her loyalty or affection, but I took for granted the smaller gestures that showed how well she understood me. One of those elements was in not buying me typical children’s coloring books, but she got me ones with geometric figures, images of the Greek gods and mythology, and blank books where I could color the cover but fill in the pages for myself.

Many of those books, I still have. Most are filled with my childish poems.

Yet, somewhere along my writing journey I ignored the inner poet. My creative energies focused in different areas. My writing focused on what seemed “proper writing”. Still, my journals are peppered with poems. These blog posts have poems. Poetry has been a thread throughout.

So, when I attended that yoga-writing retreat a few months ago, I discovered I actually DO write poetry. I might really be a poet AND a writer. Then, I got to work.

Shortly after the retreat, I collated all the poems that I have posted on this blog with ones from recent journals. Of course, I did not go too far back in the annals of my diaries. But, I had enough poems to create a book manuscript. After many edits, it is ready for public consumption.

Available here on Amazon

More than the other two books I have published, this one brings me more pride. Perhaps, it is because these represent a true creation of my own rather than synthesizing and analyzing information for easier consumption which the Umbria books offer.

Anyway, I hope readers will enjoy these as simple offerings of silliness, thoughts, and ponderings when one leaves the clouds. More poems in the making and more ideas for books to come!

~ T 🔥🐉♋️

Path to Writing

 Going Mental, Writing  No Responses »
May 062024
 

I’m sitting here with a stack of printed pages that mark various expressions of my written work. One is a draft of the poetry book I want to publish, but need to read them to find themes and possibly re-order or reword. The other is a mere 82 pages of my novel that is finally back in the actionable part of my brain to get on the forward moving track of progress again.

While I generally try to save paper and keep most of my writing in electronic form, there does come a time when the physical print out cannot be beat. Now is that time.

With the poetry, it’s because I need to see how the poems are laid out and how they might read with spacing. As I want to consider how the page might look with possible images or combining some of the shorter ones on one page, etc. There’s more to a poetry book than meets the eye. Plus, poetry as a published form is new to me even though I have been writing poems for almost as long as I can remember writing in general.

For the novel, well, I think that my spontaneous method of writing has finally become a blockage where I forget where I left off in the various threads of the story. If I have it on paper, then it is easier to revert back to where I was. I also have bits of the stories written out in other documents, but I cannot keep track of whether or not I already included that in the main thread. So… with the printing out of it on paper, I am also returning to my software program where I can keep the flow outlined even if I am not necessarily writing it out in that order. If I can maintain a balance in being organized and letting the story come, then I think I can maintain my forward motion in getting this story on the page. I really need to get it out as I have many more stories in my head waiting in line to be allowed their moments.

So, it’s a wonderful way to start the week. In fact, starting my day with the writing made a difference since I usually start with “work”, otherwise known as the paid stuff. However, as I’m starting to consider a new creation of my creative activities, I am prioritizing my own work first knowing that the paid side-jobs will always get done anyway.

Will try to update as I progress.

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Yoga Writing Retreat

 Going Mental, Writing  No Responses »
Apr 292024
 

For some time, I have been thinking about going on a retreat for myself. I hadn’t been on one since my yoga teacher training program when we went to Bali for a week. At that time, I didn’t love the retreat experience, but was very glad I had done it.

Since arriving in Italy, I’ve made some amazing friends yet not quite felt fully integrated with them on an intellectual and spiritual level. Thankfully, I’m starting to get to know my weekly yoga classmates more , but these things take time. Also, occasionally, I look at emails received about retreats in the area or see them posted on acquaintances’ social media. However, I struggle to justify paying over a grand – either USD or Euros – for something I’m not sure I will enjoy or with people I don’t know I will like, especially if I could spend that money going on holiday with M or even a personal retreat to somewhere.

So, it was the Universe’s answer to my inquiry on something more reasonable as well as if I can make some like-minded friends on a deeper level, when I received a random email about a yoga writing retreat to be held within 1.5 hours away from home.

Although I was a bit nervous about it, I went with an open mind and heart.

Having returned, I can’t believe how fast the three days went by and how relaxed I felt amongst total strangers. We all came from different places in life, but were united in our interest in yoga and writing.

I’m very proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone, opening up with my writing, and listening to my heart. Through this experience, I have more confidence in my writing ability and feel more motivated to do what I love most – write stories and poetry!

If you’re ever unsure about doing something like this, let me know because I’ll convince you to go for it!

Here’s a poem I wrote for our closing circle:

Before I came, I admit this retreat idea was terrifying
As an introvert, life outside my head is mystifying

However, of like-minded friends l am in need
So, with trust in the Universe, I followed her lead

What could be better than a combination
of yoga, writing and fellow female inspiration?

To Elizabeth with gratitude
Thank you for your beautiful attitude
Toward the forming of our words
And the open spirit of letting us be heard.

To Amity with grace
Namaste for creating a sacred yoga space
For stretching our bodies and minds,
But, dang all those binds!

And Ria, whose next move stands on the brink
I see you in shades of sweet pink

Oh lady in orange, Lauren
A word I’d never use for you is “borin'”

For Eva, there are shades of green
In heart and spirit, we understand even if not knowing what all our words mean

Not just your hair, but red for Mariella
As grounded and sweet, Che bella!

Let’s not forget Martin
After all that delicious food, a diet I have to now be startin’

So with a warm heart
I’m sad we will soon be apart
But I won’t be a sap,
Thank goodness for WhatsApp!

~T 🔥🐉♋️

In the clouds

 Writing  No Responses »
Nov 062022
 

When we are above the clouds
The sun shines and the sea of white 
Rolls to eternity 

The soft pillows of fluff lay the ground
For the angels to roam and play 
It is a small piece of heaven that 
We can touch 

In a plane 
In our dreams

Inevitably we must descend 
The puffs stretch into wisps 
Then turbulence hits
As our view becomes blocked

We are blinded into a fog
No end can be seen 
We can only bounce around
Bumping along waiting for the eventual clearing 

Then we pass through 
Our fears of the unknown no longer legitimate 
For we continue to fly
Soaring toward our destination with relief
With excitement 

The clouds that were just below 
Are now above
Their cover is a promise
As the angels look down 
Like a blanket and lid of protection 

We continue on 
Leaving the clouds for 
Another day 

~T October 26, 2022

A poem: Life Just Is

 Writing  1 Response »
May 052022
 

Life just is – a wandering of this world
trying to discover what will unfurl.

Life just is – a string of experiences
some good, some bad, some open doors, others fences.

Life just is – a chance to learn
about ourselves, about others, about on what we should concern.

Life just is – but a brief moment
and of what is beyond us, we only have a hint.

Life just is – the here, the now
and each day, I simply try to survive it somehow.

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Ode to the Misery of Allergies

 Going Mental  No Responses »
Mar 292022
 

Oh the sniffing, the sneezing!
Thankfully, I’m not yet wheezing.

It’s that time of year
when being outside causes fear.

How long can I last
before the final pollen is cast?

I try to stay upbeat
never wanting to admit defeat.

But, alas, I cannot keep up the fight
as my puffy eyes decrease my sight.

I cannot pretend anymore it is funny
that my nose is always runny.

So, it’s back inside I go
losing again to nature – my greatest foe!

😜

~T 🔥🐉♋️

Happiness in June

 Going Mental  1 Response »
Sep 012021
 
  • Happiness today is a sense of accomplishment
    reflecting on how the last year has went,
    but also taking a break
    to see what will awake
    for more success
    in feeling more, not less.
  • Happiness today is setting aside time for me
    and letting the mind and body just be
    focused on with a massage
    without a worry or concern about my visage.
  • Happiness today is a good night’s sleep
    waking up and out of the deep,
    fully rested for the day ahead
    and getting out of the right side of the bed.
  • Happiness today is the grey Monday morning
    that focuses one to work inside without a sense of forlorning
    that usually comes
    when one prefers to play in the sun.
  • Happiness today is the realization of a routine
    that has become natural again, if you what what I mean?
    The tea preparations made
    and the mat is laid
    to start the day
    in a positive way.
  • Happiness today is a sense of fulfilling
    the life purpose that is developing
    to be in the spirit that inspires
    others to aspire
    and be
    the greatest human they can see.
  • Happiness today is reconnecting with a friend
    with whom one was unsure if the connection was at an end
    because life has ups and downs
    but changes occur in leaps and bounds;
    so to reconnect
    does positively the soul affect.
  • Happiness today is believing in myself and my convictions
    so as not to be led by others’ predilections
    toward drawing lines requiring one to decide
    rather than respecting a different side
    for life is not about disparity
    but rather in acknowledging our unity.
  • Happiness today is having a sense of connection
    with others even though I’d rather be in my own section
    most of the time – still finding what unites us
    can be worth all the fuss.
  • Happiness today is enjoying the quiet
    away from the voices that riot
    from time and space in my mind
    and taking the time to myself be kind.
  • Happiness today is the starting of the week
    laying plans that will undoubtedly need to be tweaked,
    but still there is excitement in what is ahead
    enough, to get this one out of bed.
  • Happiness today is waking up feeling okay
    despite an evening of libations and laughing away
    with newish friends in the town
    during the spring jazz festival time getting down.
  • Happiness today is feeling heard
    to be given time to sit and listen to the birds
    and surround myself in the calm
    before all the bells alarm!

Happiness in May

 Creative Meanderings, Writing  No Responses »
Aug 032021
 
  • Happiness is the waking of the dawn
    when the birds sing their song
    to catch their bugs and worms,
    when the air is fresh and there are no terms
    when it’s quiet before human activity begins
    to overwhelm and override their sins.
  • Happiness is that feeling of familiarity
    seeing the world with comfortable clarity,
    knowing what’s around the bend
    and hoping the peace never ends.
  • Happiness today is the sense of release,
    the built up stress can temporarily cease!
  • Happiness today is the sun shining through the wind,
    sitting in the warmth of its rays welcoming whatever the universe will send.
  • Happiness today is the yoga mat
    where one can be sat
    focusing on breath, body, and alignment
    with the mind, soul, and physical to find a balance and be content.
  • Happiness today is being present in the here and now
    without worrying about the what, when, or how;
    breathing in, breathing out; I am here, now.
  • Happiness today is my morning cup of coffee
    what lies inside and ahead we cannot yet see,
    but that is what makes the adventure;
    creating our greatest future.
  • Happiness today is companionship and love
    in the form of soulmates and kindred spirits sent from above;
    through laughter, food, and wine
    we shall enjoy the passing of time.
  • Happiness today comes with a purr,
    the warmth and softness of their fur;
    patiently waiting for me to wake
    for the food they are dying to partake.
  • Happiness today is in the rain coming down
    as it means a period indoors aside from a quick trip to town;
    cats are napping thanks to the grey,
    but even that makes me smile, I have to say!
  • Happiness today is the cup of English Breakfast tea
    made as part of the morning routine for my husband and me;
    it’s the compromise of our blending – English and American –
    first there’s tea, then coffee, sometimes made by me and sometimes by my man.
  • Happiness today is the adrenaline rushing
    in preparation for nearly 200 people watching
    an online event for adoptees,
    who were all sent overseas.
  • Happiness today is the feeling of making a difference
    when another being can sense
    they are not alone,
    but through their tribe, are at home.
  • Happiness today is the color green
    and the gift of all that can be seen;
    sometimes we miss or take for granted
    a view that may be slanted
    on the spectrum toward grey,
    but there are so many colors in a day.
  • Happiness today is feeling awake
    besides getting up early by mistake,
    with a restless night’s sleep,
    a nap in the afternoon sun will be no leap.

~T 😀

Here, Now

 Writing  No Responses »
Jun 182020
 

Wrote this about a month ago, but never got around to posting it. It hasn’t been edited, but came about in my morning meditation as I focused on my breath ~inhale here ~exhale now:

A newborn baby cries swathed in his mother’s arms;
She whispers, “I’m here with you right now.”

A toddler takes her tentative first steps and stumbles;
her father picks her up smiling, “I’m here with you right now.”

A child spills off his bike for the first time without training wheels;
his mother picks him up with a laugh, “I’m here with you right now.”

A teenager cries at her first broken heart;
her mother wipes away the tears with a hug, “I’m here with you now.”

A graduate pauses before his valedictorian speech;
his father proudly mouths, “I’m here with you now.”

A bride excitedly waits to walk down the aisle;
her father sweetly calms her, “I’m here with you now.

A dying mother looks at her family as they all say: “We are here with you now.”

~T 😀
May 20, 2020

_Poems of Paul Celan_ translated by Michael Hamburger

 Literary Escapes  No Responses »
Jun 022017
 


_Poems of Paul Celan_ translated by Michael Hamburger
Somewhere I found this title on a list of books that one should read and so I put it on my Amazon wishlist of paper books to remember for later. 

My mother likes to give physical presents rather than ecards or vouchers so one Christmas a couple of years ago, I got this to read. I had totally forgotten that I put it on a list! 😜

So, it took me a bit of time to get through it as I tend not to read paper books very often outside of the bathroom or occasionally poolside. 😬

However, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Although I have gotten a bit out of reading poetry regularly I find that perhaps I should incorporate it more into my reading repertoire as I find them inspiring and thought-provoking. 

Celan’s poems reflect the survival of the Second World War and romantic view of life and love. While I may not keep his work on my bookshelf since I’m decreasing my material possessions I will recommend his work for those interested in poetry. 😍

~T 😀

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