Remember a few days ago I wrote about the Gong Bath Meditation? Well, in my meditation I had some visions that we focused on feeling the manifestations of their truths in our physical bodies. Since then, I have had a hard time meditating for more than 15 minutes at a time as I keep going back to trying to understand what my visions were. It is a little bit like trying to interpret dreams. So, I am going to write in hopes of perhaps coming to some understanding or some reader out there might have an idea…?
In part of the meditation, we were asked to see ourselves in the future. Well, I saw three versions of myself. It was like three faces on one head of my body. None were dominant, but all three faces were moving at the same time in one body.
Furthermore, I saw myself in the future as a published author touring around the world about my books. Yes, not just a book, but bookS! I was meeting people, inspiring people and sharing my stories of life. Any introversion that I may have felt was washed away in warmth of knowing and seeing that I was having a massive impact on others.
The latter of these two visions I can wrap my head around. The former…, well, I am still working on that.
Of course, it is easy to now say I should be writing. I just need to sit down and write – how hard can it be? Well…it is a lot harder than it seems.
First, I have not written properly in a very long time – years now. I have stories in my head, loads of ideas on topics and themes, but each time I sit to write, I lose my voice. Now, if I were giving an oral speech and I lost my voice, I would be not-so-secretly relieved. ๐ However, losing my voice in writing is not exactly ideal. Instead, I sit to write, I look at a blank screen or the few sentences and then…I go blank. Some call this writer’s block. I am readingย _The Artist’s Way_ to help me with this, but still I am not finding my voice. One reason I have been trying hard to go this whole month with writing each day is to build up a routine and practice of writing at least something somewhere. However, I have a business website to build as well and yet, nothing is coming to me. I am searching for my voice…. ๐
It does not help that it is Ramadan here and I cannot sit myself at a cafรฉ all day sipping coffee or tea, people watching whilst intermittently immersing myself into a world of words. However, that might just be an excuse. Surely, I should be able to delve into the many voices in my head and capture just one long enough to write…. <sigh>
So, for now I find contentment in my blogging here. Random thoughts flow out to my fingertips and I am maintaining my journal daily. However, if anyone out there happens to find my voice, would you be so kind as to let me know? I would really appreciate it. In the meantime, I will keep searching…. ๐
~T ๐
