At the end of last week as I was visiting with a friend I could feel the skin around my mouth itching and a familiar tingle on the edge of my lip. Hoping that it was not what I thought it was, I tried to ignore it. Despite my attempts, the tingling got worse and by the end of my visit, the fever blisters had boiled up on my mouth. Usually I am home or carry around ointment with me to catch the outbreak before it goes into full blast, but sadly this time I was not able to do so.
Ever since I got really sick one year as a kid I have gotten fever blisters. Normally, they are a result of my body getting run down from sickness or from stress. Initially, I did think I was getting sick as many people are carrying around yucky bits with their kids going back to school and everyone’s immune systems going haywire trying to find balance from everything brought in from people’s trips around the world during the summer. However, (knock on wood) I have not yet been fully taken down by anything, which leaves stress as the remaining factor in causing my outbreak.
Now, I really do not like to admit to stress or sickness. Yet, it is obvious that there has been a lot of stress in our lives lately; therefore, there is no point in denying that it is there. I am just about at my wits-end with patience in our situation, but need to hang in there just a little bit longer. While I am okay with myself not admitting to stress or giving myself pep talks to stay positive, I am less keen to hear it from others.
So, the other day a friend of mine (who happens to be African-American) went on a monologue about how I had nothing to stress about; there are people dying and children starving who have REAL things to stress about; so I should relax and count my blessings. Obviously, I did not really want to hear this. Yes, of course, I know this reality and of course I am grateful for what we have despite our stressful inconveniences. In the grand scheme of the world, I really do not have anything to stress about or worry about. Still, it does not mean that my current feeling, physical response (look at my face!) and mental state should be de-valued or under-played because at the moment it is real for me.
After taking a bit of a step back from it and having another conversation with another African-American friend on another topic, I came to realize that it is a common theme for AAs to diminish the ‘suffering’ of others under the impression that no one has suffered like they have or do. While I am not devaluing the historical and origins of suffering for their community, I am contemplating the relativity of it along with the need to make others feel sure life could be worse ie. like theirs….
In any case, it has been good for the contemplation, if nothing else. π
~T π
Day 2 of the 21-day Sugar Detox meal was a repurposing of the meatballs from Day 1. Therefore, I used Fed & Fit’s Breakfast Salad as the base for dinner. So, instead of sausage balls, I used the leftover meatballs. Also, I added spinach as the salad base and left out the cilantro to make it a more hearty dinner salad.
M’s feedback was “I think this might be the best salad you have ever made!” π And, I have made a lot of salads lately…. π
