The other day I was sharing a bit of our challenging situation with a friend. Every time I do speak with a friend to update on our life or share our current story, they always comment on how calm I seem to be about everything. In fact, when they say it I realize it is true, I am very calm. So calm that it almost feels as if I might be in denial or something.
However, I attribute any sense of calm in me to meditative work as well as an acceptance of not worrying about what I cannot do anything about.
As a young adult I spent much of it worrying about everything – literally. There was very little I did not worry about even those things that did not require worrying, like what outfit to wear to the grocery store!
Of course, as we mature, we come to realize that there are just things that we do not need to spend our time fretting about. Still, as I speak with friends and listen to updates on their lives, I also find that they still worry about those matters that do not need worry….
So what is my secret? Well, I do not know if it is a secret per se, but rather a concerted effort to parse out whether or not I can do something about the situation. If I can, then I determine a course of action to take towards sorting out the problem. If I can plan to do something about it, then I make a plan to do so. However, ultimately, if I cannot do anything, then there is absolutely no point in me worrying or wasting time on it.
I have come to see that when the time is right solutions present themselves that I or we can take action upon. Therefore, it is a matter of patience over anything else.
Even my having gotten sick on a weekend when I should be doing training, I have come to accept that this is the situation. There is no need to push myself to extremes so that my body feels tired and gets worse. I mean I have a holiday to prepare for and being sick is NOT part of that plan. π
So…yes, I am extremely calm these days. While there is always something to worry about, I feel that minimizing what I spend my time worrying on maximizes the energy I have for everything else!
~T π
