So, why all the Mistaken Identity Dialogues? Well, as you may have gathered, I am not Chinese. I am Asian-American. However, I do not call myself Asian-American – just American. Asian-American holds the nuiance that I have Asian culture in my upbringing or that I identify with being Asian in some way.
I am an adopted Korean. I grew up in a very white community with average white-American parents and family. I went to camp once a year for 5-6 years where other Korean adoptees like me met up and pretended we were “normal” for a week. It was only then that I learned about Korean culture, language and food. The rest of the 51 weeks of the year, I was a pseudo-white American.
Now, I live in Japan and have for about 9 years. Adoption is not talked about or really understood in Japan. Everyone Asian is Japanese or should be. When I visited Korea, everyone Asian was Korean or should be. I speak Japanese. I do not speak Korean. Yet, despite these two cultures that are somewhat part of my life, I often most commonly mistaken as Chinese.
I grew up being called “Chinese Tara”. I am NOT Chinese. I do not WANT to be Chinese. I AM AMERICAN! <sigh> But, then why is it so important to me?
We all have an identity that we hold on to and want others to accept as who we are. By constantly being told what my identity is, I am often frustrated and bewildered that this is such a common occurrence. Are there cases where someone is told, “You are American”, despite a correction of, “No, I am from France”? I doubt it. So, I wonder what about me says it is okay to challenge who I am? I wonder do others like me struggle with the same thing? I think there must be, but their voices aren’t heard. Thus, I felt it was time. It’s time to write about it. It’s time to talk about it. It’s time to hold firm to who I am!
So, this site is for my writings. Dialogues, short stories and such. Not all will be related to me not being Chinese as that will get old after a while. I believe I write in a variety of styles and genres, so we’ll see.
I’d appreciate comments, feedback, criticisms or whatever to know that I am being read and heard.
Until the next installment,
-T
